Hellscapade: Post Six

Azgoth walked into his office, saw the insanely high stack of paperwork sitting on his desk and immediately incinerated the entire mess. He realized that in about an hour an even larger stack would be sitting there waiting for him, but he just couldn’t resist.

“Are we done bringing down balefire on that oh so dangerous accumulation of dead trees?” Percy asked cheerfully.

“Yes,” he said with a glare for his bouncy assistant. “And it was very satisfying. Of course, I could always track down the source of my problem and take care of that.”

Percy just laughed. “As if. Need I remind you of the state of this office when I first arrived!”

Damnation. The cute little demon had him over a barrel and he knew it.

He just sighed mightily and asked his daily question. “So what do I absolutely need to deal with this morning?” At which point a much smaller stack of paper materialized on his desk.

“You think you’re clever but really…”

“I am clever. After seeing everything on the docket, the urgent stack seems much less intimidating now doesn’t it? I don’t know why you persist in questioning me,” Percy asked with an epic eye roll.

Just then the blue alarm chimed, and his improving mood threatened to disappear.

He reluctantly pressed the incoming call button and the shimmering projection of Commander Stone appeared before him. “My Lord,” Stone said with a sardonic bow. “It would seem I am sending you reinforcements sooner rather than later.”

“I thought you were sending me a new pair in a month?” he asked.

“Yes, well, apparently your newest recruit is currently flirting with a cool half mil in bounty on his head. So HellsGate definitely seems like a much safer place to send him.”

“A human agent. In Hell, policing demons distributing hallucinogens. With no training. That’s safer?” Azgoth asked, laughing.

“Yup. He arrested the son of a prominent Senator. He dies, and the case goes away. So good luck bringing him up to speed. I’m sending Rakon as his partner,” Stone informed him, smirking slightly.

“Oh, fuck no.”

“Oh, fuck yes. With no training, it’s the most I can do for the kid. I like him. He’s dedicated. Ideal and stupid, but dedicated. Rakon will protect him better than anyone I can think of.”

“You do realize that idiot was exiled for a reason don’t you? You think pissing off a Senator is bad, Rakon drove Lucifer into a frothing mess the last time he was down here,” Azgoth said. He was ranting. He could tell he was ranting. But seriously. Stone was being ridiculous.

“Well, keep him away from the big boss, and deal. Because they are coming as a package deal. Good luck with that!” Stone said and cut the communications link.

Azgoth sighed and turned around, only to see Percy sneakily coming back into his office.

“Where were you? You’re supposed to sit through and suffer through those calls with me!” he thundered at his suddenly nervous assistant. Whining then erupted in the silence that followed his shout.

“Oh, hells, no. You did not. Not again. What were you thinking?”

“But Azgoth, they were just so…” Percy began, as Azgoth strode into the outer office.

He stopped at the door and stared at the wriggling mass of bodies that was spilling out from under Percy’s desk. Obviously, the little nitwit had tried to contain them in a basket under there. Luckily one resistant to fire, if the idiot had learned anything from the last time.

He did a double-take as the first set of eyes met his straight on.

“Actual hell hounds this time? Last time it was the kittens. And the time before that just balefire pups. But actual hell hound puppies? Do you know how big those things grow? And where the heck did you find them? Bozziz keeps a tight rein on all hellhounds in this domain.”

“They were in the molten river that I cross to get here every day, sir” Percy stumbled out, for once sounding serious and contrite. “I couldn’t just leave them, they would have drowned. As for why they were there, I don’t think these are full hell hounds…”

And that cute little face just looked at him from the floor in front of the desk and let out a mighty roar, which came out as a hiccuping chirp. He looked closer and noticed the very lion-like tail. He struggled to keep his face set in his “seriously irked” pose while struggling with laughter. Really, one of Boz’s precious hounds had decided to dally with one of Sabnock’s lions. Oh, the beauty of the thought. So much havoc he could wreak amongst his brothers with that knowledge.

On that thought, the little one charged out in front of his litter mates, gave another hiccup of a roar, and laid down hellfire in Azgoth’s direction.

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